So we had a couple of Pre School visits for Darcey today, after speaking to her childminder we just have to do what’s best for us as a family. So making the decision to put her in a pre school, which is free for us as we get the 30 hours free childcare and work for Glenn (Ali’s husband) is the best option for us. I may be earning a lot less than what I would in the school, but after paying for petrol and childcare, I’ll be left with less money than working part time and pay for no childcare and take Marnie with me to work and to baby groups. Ali, who said, “it wouldn’t be forever”, comforted me. It’s true, nothing lasts forever and I don’t want to regret anything. I want to be able to take both girls to school, to be able to see assemblies and plays. I want them to have a different childhood to me. I don’t remember my mum coming to see much if not any of my things when I was younger. I remember one assembly I did, I was picked out of the whole of my class to get a special award about a piece of writing I did on coyotes. Parents were invited to come along and see their children receive a certificate and all the parents were there except mine. I was always the last child to be picked up, so ended up in the office most days. When I think back on those times I do get sad. I don’t want that for my children, I want to be there for them all the time, I want to remember everything they do at school.
I’m 99% sure that I’m making the right decision and after speaking to some family, they are thinking it’s the best choice for us right now too, which makes me happy to know we have the backing of them to go ahead with everything I’m choosing to do. It seems things are slowly moving into place. Fingers crossed.
Something that’s been on the back of our minds is a Will. Who would have the girls if anything happened to us? And the only people that we would want to raise our girls are Ali and Glenn. They are amazing to both girls and for us; they are the only ones that would raise them how we would. I don’t want the rest of the family to feel like they weren’t thought about, you obviously think about different factors with different couples and some had children of their own, others live too far away from the girls home and I would want them to be around the people that they know and love and we know that Ali and Glenn will make sure they are able to keep all of those people in their lives.
*Post originally written 28th September 2017*
Thankfully, they’ve already said yes. So this won’t be a surprise to them!